[DETHKLOK MINUTE HOST]
Though Dethklok hasn’t performed in a very long while.
A big show is coming up which will be just in time
because people around the world have been very concerned
about the lack of Toki Wartooth in the press world.
He hasn’t been seen in public, where could he be?
The band released a statement:
[CFO]
He’s fine don’t worry about Toki.
[DETHKLOK MINUTE HOST]
Well he’s okay and we’ll see when they play.
That’s the Dethklok minute. Have a great day.
[FANS]
He’s been out of the public eye.
We’re worried we’ll be denied.
One fifth of our favorite band.
We’re the power. We’re the fans.
We want answers. Where’s Toki? Where’s Toki?
We want answers. Where is the man?
[FANS (CONT’D)]
We’re going online we’re gonna get to the bottom of this.
Going online gunna get to the bottom of this.
[FAT FAN]
I heard a rumor from my roommate Matt
that he can’t play guitar because he got too fat.
[WEIRD FACE FAN]
I heard Toki’s at a rehab place
because he did so many drugs that
he melted his face.
[FAN THAT LOOKS LIKE A LIZARD]
I heard he’s getting plastic surgery done.
They’re putting in horns and cleaving his tongue.
[BALD FAN]
I heard he’s gone cause his hair went away.
They’re putting in transplants now he’s totally gay.
[FANS 1]
You’re gay!
[FANS 2]
You’re gay!
[FANS 1]
You’re gay!
[FANS 2]
You’re gay!
[MAGNUS]
You are all wrong you don’t know the whole story.
Toki’s been kidnapped with the girl by some men.
Oh Dethklok could save them but they can’t be bothered.
These cowards may never see their Toki again!
Dethklok doesn’t care about their best friends.
They could be responsible for their death!
[NATHAN]
It’s good to be here tonight!
Lemme hear ya!
[CROWD]
[screams]
[NATHAN]
And on rhythm guitar Mr Toki Wartooth!!
[Hologram of Toki is glitching and fans see there is no Toki]
[CROWD]
Boooo!!!
[FANS]
We want Toki back! [8x]
[NATHAN]
Oh my god they’re leaving the show.
[PICKLES]
We don’t want our fans to go!
[NATHAN]
I think I know what I must do...
People of the world I want you to know.
Toki! We’re coming to save you!
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